Monday, January 9, 2012

lessons learned

Today is the day!  My treadmill will  be graced by my presence more regularly. I do love to exercise... it is getting the habit started that I struggle with. No more excuses... I have got the tools and the time.

I can no longer let life get in the way of my life. I let the stress of 2011 take over. I did a lot of soul searching for sure and learned so many valuable lessons about life and myself.

I learned...

I am worth the time. If I don't take care of me, I am worthless to everyone else.

So, while my heart and my mind have made extraordinary changes mentally, it is now time for my physical changes to begin. I know I will feel better, inside and out.

On another note.... I  learned a valuable lesson this weekend regarding teenagers.. Conner is soon to be 13 and Maddie is weeks away from 11. The teenager-ish changes are well underway.
 It still amazes me how quickly my little ones have gone from this...

to this, in no time flat....

 While most of the time Conner is still that sweet, silly hearted guy I know and love... sometimes this surly, disagreeable, grouch comes out. A different type of child than I have ever known. Maddie, who has always been pretty easy going, has become easier to upset, storming off in tears over the slightest thing. I totally get that they can't help themselves, and hardly even know they are doing it. It is still exhausting. This teenager stuff is all new to me. I felt so confident as the mother of little ones. This, not so much, so I must learn, make mistakes and figure out what the heck I am to do with these "new" people. I'm getting there, day by day.

Over the weekend my sweet little man had a teenager moment. My first instinct is to punish him when he acts like that. I have, and it makes everyone feel bad.  This weekend I did just that and it hit me. If I had  remained calm and went about our business, I would have stayed in control and he would have snapped out of his mood faster.
Instead of just giving in to his moodiness, trying to prove a point (that he totally didn't get anyway) and becoming part of the problem, I should have remained calm but matter of fact and stuck to the plan. I am willing to bet he would have sulked for a bit and then returned that fun guy we love to have around.

Growing up and changing is hard, on them and on us. The lesson I learned is this...

The less of a battle we make it the easier it is on all of us. I need to lead by example. Remain positive and light hearted. If I do that I know they will follow.

and yeah, I already knew this, it is true with all age kids, but I think it takes experience to be able to put these lessons into play in the stages we are in at the time, sometimes it takes doing it the wrong way to realize how to do it right. ~S

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